Coffee & Flowers: Trying Not To Feel Bad

Today, I had to ask to be sent home from work early because the thing they don’t tell you about the treatment of amoebiasis is that’s it is fucking painful. Mahapdi kind of pain, too. I spent my lunch break doubled-over while eating spam on a park bench (you gotta eat, the doctor said) and wondering how to tell my boss that I felt like dying. Anyway, in the end they let me go although I do feel disappointed in myself for not being able to sit the day out. Or I don’t know if that disappointment is just a defense mechanism for being afraid that I’ll get fired. I made my quota (a little over), even if I was half-day today but who knows, you know? Things happen. Mleh.

ImageAnyway, there’s nothing I can do about the amoebs except sit the pain out (at home), so I’ve been trying not to feel bad about the whole thing and just do shiz that will make the rest time worthwhile (although, don’t get me wrong–just not writhing in pain in itself is pretty worthwhile). So I’ve been listening to a lot of music and reading (or trying to, without falling asleep: this medicine is crazy strong) and writing. I’ve also downloaded s03e07 of GIRLS–so I’m looking forward to watching that in a bit.

So, yeah. :)) Basically trying not to feel bad. It is difficult, but it can be done! I thiiiink.



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